Foreword; Prologue; Patriarchys Price; Saying Goodbye to the Harsh Father; Discovering the Kind Father; Looking Inside; Speaking What I Feel; Anger: Escape from Feeling; Forgiveness and Freedom; Epilogue.
The male case against patriarchy - why it hurts men, and how they can change it.
Calvin Sandborn is the Legal Director of the Environmental Law Clinic at the University of Victoria's Faculty of Law in British Columbia. A well-known free-lance journalist, he has published widely in Canadian newspapers and magazines, and has authored a number of books. He is a member of a Victoria men's group and the father of three.
"Amid so many voices calling on men to be tough, to be manly, Calvin Sandborn calls on them to be kind, to be human. I pray that it is his voice that will prevail."- Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People "Becoming the Kind Father is an inspiring autobiographical guidebook to the development of heart in men. Calvin Sandborn shares what he has learned as he creates the space for forgiveness and gentleness in himself. The book is both wise and unsparing as it dissects the harsh training men perpetuate - and shows us what it takes to escape the patriarchal prison of a lack of feeling and a lack of heart."- Frederic Luskin, Ph.D., author of Forgive for Good and Director, Stanford University Forgiveness Project"Professor Sandborn's well-referenced book is crammed with valuable self-help tips that when practiced will help debunk society's macho myth and give birth to the real man who is loving, sensitive, gentle, and kind."- John Bradshaw, author of Homecoming, Creating Love, and Healing the Shame that Binds You "In this remarkable book, story and lessons-learned are finely woven together. Narrative passages of memory and observation are moving, and beautifully written, while the author's suggestions for individual growth are both reasonable and wise, with the strength of extensive research and personal experience behind them."- Jack Hodgins, author of Broken Ground and A Passion for Narrative "A must-read for anyone who has imagined practical alternatives to the destructive energy of their own or a father's chronic fury. As one who has walked the walk before talking the talk, Calvin Sandborn understands that angry men are made not born and that nurturing compassion for oneself is the key to choosing to live free of anger's burden. Becoming the Kind Father has the hallmarks of a classic-to-be: true-life stories, vividly related, that deftly illustrate important truths men can use to enrich their own everyday lives and, consequently, the lives of those they love."- David Greer, author of Simple Pleasures and A Book of Wishes "As fathers, we spend a tremendous amount of time and energy trying to make our children happy and trying to be heroes to them. In the process, they never get to know who we really are. In Becoming the Kind Father, Calvin Sandborn takes the reader on a journey of self-discovery that, ultimately, will help us be better men and better fathers."- Armin Brott ("Mr. Dad"), author of The Expectant Father and Father for Life
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