Table of Contents

Introduction  1

Part I: Essentials of Emotionally Focused Therapy  5

Chapter 1: The Basics of Emotionally Focused Therapy 7

Chapter 2: Understanding the Power of Emotion in Relationships 17

Chapter 3: Organizing Your Emotional World 39

Chapter 4: Identifying the Three Levels of Emotional Experience 59

Part II: Emotionally Focused Therapy in Action: Moving from Problems to Patterns  73

Chapter 5: Finding Common Patterns of Conflict 75

Chapter 6: Finding Common Roles in Conflict 101

Chapter 7: Working Toward Fighting Less and Feeling Better 121

Part III: Finding Intimacy in New Ways  145

Chapter 8: Seeing through Withdrawing Eyes 147

Chapter 9: Seeing through Pursuing Eyes 159

Chapter 10: Facing Fears and Finding Each Other 171

Chapter 11: Overcoming Common Blocks 185

Chapter 12: Dealing with Infidelity 207

Part IV: Moving Forward Together  229

Chapter 13: Finding New Solutions to Old Problems 231

Chapter 14: Securing Your Future 255

Chapter 15: Working with a Couple Therapist 271

Part V: The Part of Tens  285

Chapter 16: Ten Questions to Ask a Therapist Before You Make an Appointment 287

Chapter 17: Ten Rituals to Bring You Closer293

Chapter 18: Ten Myths about Emotion and Relationships 301

Chapter 19: Ten Myths about Sex 309

Appendix: Resources  317

Index  321

About the Author

Brent Bradley, PhD, is Associate Professor of Family Therapy at the University of Houston-Clear Lake, and president of The Couple Zone (www.couplezone.org). Dr. Bradley is a certified emotionally focused couple therapist, supervisor, and trainer. James Furrow, PhD, is Professor of Marital and Family Therapy at the Fuller Graduate School of Psychology. Dr. Furrow is executive director of the Los Angeles Center for EFT and a certified emotionally focused couple therapist, supervisor, and trainer.