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She Comes First


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The indispensable guide to sex by a leading expert.

About the Author

Ian Kerner is a licensed psychotherapist and nationally recognized sexuality counselor who specializes in sex therapy, couples therapy and working with individuals on a range of relational issues. He holds a doctorate in Clinical Sexology from the American Academy of Clinical Sexologists and contributes regularly to CNN Health.


Dispelling the widely held myth of genital penetration as the apogee of sexual pleasure, Kerner, who holds a doctorate in clinical sexology, offers this witty, well-researched manual for "consistently leading women to orgasm" through cunnilingus. Loaded with practical anatomical information (the clitoris has 18 distinct parts, and more nerve fibers than any other part of the human body) and graphic line drawings, the book also touches on the less mechanical, more psychological aspects of oral sex, including the three assurances every woman needs from her lover to feel comfortable: (1) "you enjoy it as much as she does"; (2) "there's no rush"; and (3) "Her scent is provocative, her taste powerful: it all emanates from the same beautiful essence." Since studies show the average woman takes about 20 minutes to reach her first orgasm during a typical sex session, while men take a mere four minutes, Kerner advises men to delay their own climax and make oral sex "coreplay" ("the substantive phase in which sexual tension builds, culminates and then releases itself through the female orgasm"), instead of foreplay. Breaking down six stages of coreplay, from the "first kiss" to orgasm, Kerner speaks to both beginners and more seasoned lovers. His candor concerning his own bout with sexual dysfunction adds a compassionate tone and credibility to this decidedly pro-female methodology. Agent, Richard Abate. (June) Forecast: Kerner works as a sex therapist in New York, and will do local media. Regan is arranging book and t-shirt giveaways and features with Jane magazine, and a radio satellite tour. It seems the publisher is betting on women to buy the book and give it to their partners. Copyright 2004 Reed Business Information.

An entire book written strictly for the pleasure of women by a man. Hallelujah! * Playgirl *
A practical, friendly, well-written guide for men who want to give better orgasms and the women who will be lining up to love them. * Cindy Chupack, Executive Producer, Sex and the City *
Perhaps it's time we paid more than lip service to the idea of true sexual liberation, and perhaps She Comes First is just the sort of talking point we need to get us started. -- Susanna Forrest * Guardian *
Some women feel uncomfortable about oral sex. Others are Ian Kerner fans. -- The Times * . *
If your man understands what's under the hood of a car better than the hood of a clitoris, this will enlighten him. -- Top Sante Health & Beauty * . *
Every man's must-read. Tell your guy to put down the remote and pick up She Comes First. -- Cosmopolitan US * . *
Before you give up on oral sex... if you yourself don't know what the options are... get yourself a copy of Ian Kerner's manifesto She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman and make sure your boyfriend reads it too... It is a veritable paean to the art of good oral sex, packed with instructive sentences... I cannot recommend it highly enough. -- Suzi Godson * The Times *

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