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Take the Bully by the Horns

How often have you wished you knew how to defuse the difficult people who wreak havoc on your life? Whether it's a neighbor who keeps disturbing your peace, an employer who manipulates you into unpaid overtime, a spouse who criticizes and controls your every move, a colleague who uses scare tactics to intimidate you, or a student who teases your child without mercy, "Take the Bully by the Horns" will give you real-life strategies stop people from taking advantage of you, including how to: * Adopt a "don't you dare" attitude* Refuse to play The Blame-Shame Game* Beat em to the punch...line* Stop paying the price of nice * Put all kidding aside* Act on your anger instead of suffering in silence* Savior Self from martyrs and guilt-mongers* Not be victimized by crazy-making Jekyll/Hyde personalities* Adopt the Clarity Rules and RightsWith these tools, you can take back your peace of mind and your sanity. You'll be able to fight back constructively and prevent harrassment by bullies, from the workplace to the schoolyard. The bold suggestions in "Take the Bully by the Horns" will show you once and for all how to convince unfair or unkind relatives, co-workers, customers, or strangers to either behave cooperatively or leave you alone.
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About the Author

Sam Horn, president of Action Seminars, has presented her real-life workshops to more than 400,000 people since 1981. Her impressive client list includes Young Presidents Organization, National Governors Association, Hewlett-Packard, Four Seasons Resort, the Fortune 500 Forum, the US Navy, and the IRS. She was the top rated speaker at both the 1996 and 1998 International Platform Association conventions in Washington DC, and is the emcee of the world-renowned Maui Writers Conference. She is also the author of Tongue Fu!, What's Holding You Back?, and ConZentrate, which have been featured in Readers Digest, The Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, Cosmopolitan, Entertainment Weekly, Family Circle, Bottom Line Personal, and Executive Female, to name a few. She is a frequent media guest who has appeared on numerous TV and radio shows, including "To Tell the Truth" and NPR's popular "Diane Rehm Show." She lives with her sons Tom and Andrew in Virginia.


The subtitle of Horn's treatise indicates just how much psychological ground he manages to cover in this encouraging how-to. Not just for kids on the playground anymore, bullying can have serious consequences for adults: violence, lawsuits, abuse and even death. Many of the "28 Ways to Lose Your Bully" strategies Horn (Tongue Fu) outlines are common sense, the same advice parents might give children after a rough recess: "Put Up a Brave Front," "Get Out of My Space," "Screw Up Your Courage." The number of mini-quizzes and aphoristic sayings make the book read like a large-scale PowerPoint presentation (not surprising, as Horn is a veteran of the corporate seminar circuit). Yet there's a realism here that is convincing: Horn's example situations include spouses who hit or cheat, spouses' bosses who grope, coaches who berate, false friends who cajole confidences, business partners who steal, neighbors who instill fear and people who chronically hit up family members for bail money (or "deja moo"). Role playing "Action Plans" for conversation help firm up psychic independence and avoid pointless, draining argument. (Sept.) Copyright 2003 Cahners Business Information.

"Bullies come in all shapes, sizes, genders, ages and professions," notes Horn (Tongue Fu!). True enough, but Horn's inconsistent writing and lack of useful tools drain this book of any worth. Confusingly titled chapters "Depend on the Kinkiness of Strangers," for example, concerns personal safety and self-defense render the table of contents useless. Good, albeit brief, chapters on school-yard bullies and using humor to defuse tension are outnumbered by those that mistake insensitivity for bullying or mismatch lessons and examples. This book covers much the same ground as Brandon Toropov's The Complete Idiot's Guide to Getting Along with Difficult People and Robert M. Bramson's recently reprinted Coping with Difficult People. Compared with those books, Horn's work feels undercooked. Not recommended. Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information.

I believe this book is a valuable resource for anyone who has ever been victimized. "Sal Severe, Ph.D, author of How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too"" "I believe this book is a valuable resource for anyone who has ever been victimized." --Sal Severe, Ph.D, author of How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too "I believe this book is a valuable resource for anyone who has ever been victimized." --Sal Severe, Ph.D, author of" How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too"

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