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To Bed or Not to Bed

The differences between the sexes can create both fun and tension. The book presents specific information on how to use our differences to create more pleasure and intimacy in bed and elsewhere. At times, the book speaks directly to women and at other times directly to me, but both genders will be able to improve their 'game' in creating and handling relationships with one another by reading the whole book. Almost every man wants to have sex with his new partner or, if already in a relationship, with that person. Yet the authors, in their extensive practice with clients, have found that most men do not know what to do to either get a woman to bed or what to do in bed if and when they get her there. Women, also, want to have sex, but they have learned to put up obstacles for men so as not to be considered too easy. This book describes with examples and exercises, what people can do to make getting to bed and having great sex possible, easier and a whole lot of fun. The authors provide many proven sexual and sensual techniques that they have used with their clients. These include over 20 exercises, some to be done alone and others with one's partner. The book takes the reader on a journey that will hopefully lead them to bed: first meeting someone, then getting to know them and seducing them, and finally learning to take advantage of special techniques that can bring a couple years of pleasure and happiness together.
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"A foundational premise of this book" according to husband and wife authors Steve and Vera Bodansky (Extended Massive Orgasm and The Illustrated Guide to the Extended Massive Orgasm) is "our belief that women are not equal to men." It's a gimmicky way of saying men and women approach sex differently; much of the book relies on such hooks, popular in the self-help oeuvre. To wit, each chapter title has something to do with a bed-"Under the Covers" and "Pillow Talk Plus" for example. And yet, the patient reader will be rewarded with some insightful observations about the cultural conditioning, desires and drives of the opposite sex. Topics include becoming a better seducer, giving without keeping score, deliberate versus default pleasure and the importance of integrity in bed. Based on information and ideas from a number of sources, but primarily through the authors' personal experiences and the experiences of people they know, the book is most successful when it veers away from the obvious ("Make eye contact when you are in conversation with a woman") and offers practical advice and tools for establishing-and reinvigorating- intimate contact. These exercises (19 total) combined with the authors' breezy, conversational approach (they use slang where appropriate) make this guide a notable addition to the genre. - Publisher's Weekly "chapters cover a wide range of subjects for the heterosexual couple, including flirting, appreciation, responsibilities, G-Spot and so much more." - Come As You Are, March 2006 "their latest guide presents good...advice about relationships, playing on male/female differences while keeping both sexes on planet Earth." - Library Journal (February 1, 2006)

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